Weathering Winter: Supporting Each Other Through Seasonal Changes

As the days grow shorter and the air turns crisp, many of us begin to feel the shift—not just in the weather, but in our mood and energy. For some, this seasonal transition brings joy: cozy sweaters, warm drinks, and holidays with loved ones. But for others, it ushers in a wave of Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD), a type of depression that typically occurs during the fall and winter months. If you or your partner experiences SAD, it can affect not just individual well-being but also your relationship dynamics.

Here’s the good news: with awareness and intentional effort, these challenges can be navigated in ways that are ultimately constructive, allowing for your relationship to “weather” this “storm” well into the summer months.  

Understanding Seasonal Affective Disorder

SAD isn’t just “winter blues” or a fleeting sadness. It’s a form of clinical depression triggered by the changing seasons, often linked to reduced sunlight exposure. Symptoms may include persistent fatigue, difficulty concentrating, irritability, changes in appetite (like craving carbs), and feelings of hopelessness. Recognizing these signs in yourself or your partner is the first step to managing their impact on your relationship. 

Beyond the clinical definition, SAD can feel like an uninvited guest in your relationship—casting a shadow over shared moments and sapping the energy needed for connection. Acknowledging this dynamic with honesty and compassion sets the stage for a deeper partnership.

If you or your partner are struggling with SAD, it’s essential to approach the situation with empathy and patience. Imagine carrying a heavy, invisible weight—that’s often how SAD feels. Statements like “Just snap out of it” or “Think positively” can unintentionally dismiss their experience.

Instead, try phrases like, “I’m here for you” or “I’m so sorry this is hard for you right now.” These small but meaningful validations remind your partner they’re not alone.

Practical Ways to Support Each Other

1. Create a Bright Environment Together Consider investing in a light therapy lamp, which mimics natural sunlight and can help regulate mood. Place it in a shared space to benefit both of you. Open curtains during the day and organize your home for maximum light exposure. Making these changes together creates a brighter environment for both partners.
2. Focus on Seasonal Joys Instead of lamenting what’s missing, explore seasonal activities you can both enjoy. Whether it’s baking treats, watching winter movies, or bundling up for a walk, these shared moments can bring joy to both of you and lighten the mood for the partner with SAD.
3. Respect Energy Levels—Yours and Theirs Fatigue and mood swings can affect both the person with SAD and their partner. If your partner needs a quiet night, embrace the opportunity for rest yourself. Avoid overextending and check in about plans with open-ended questions like, “Would staying in feel better for both of us tonight?” Honoring each other’s cues keeps balance in the relationship.

As the leaves fall and the nights grow longer, remember: this season, like all seasons, will pass. However, it can be helpful to consider seeking support, whether individually or as a couple. Therapy, even for a short period, can offer tools for managing challenges and help you both feel more connected and understood. Looking forward to hearing from you!