What Will Inspire You to Drop Your Mask?

In Megillat Esther, a theme throughout is masks, or the hidden and the revealed. Vashti, hides from her husband to avoid being shown off by her husband Achashverosh. Bigtan and Teresh hide under the palace stairs as they plot out killing the king.  As readers of the story, we know Esther, the star of the story, is hiding her true identity. We wait until she’s finally drop her mask and reveal who she is to King Achashveirosh.
As outsiders, who know how the story ends it’s obvious to us what Esther needs to do. The dilemma and challenge that Esther experiences is not unique to her or the Purim story. At times we’re confronted by challenges. Especially when it comes to relationships. We know what we need to do, yet find it too hard to make a move that may be too far outside our comfort zone.
In the Megilla, we meet Esther as a modest young woman. This modesty, we assume hold’s her back from boldly speaking to the King on her own behalf and that of her nation. We see this as her Uncle Mordechai pushes her to join the beauty pageant from the start.
I’d like to suggest an alternate way of understanding Esther’s behavior. What if her modesty is actually a cover for her fear of showing her true self? What if she lacks self-confidence in her abilities? Modesty sounds nice, but you can only be modest if you have something to cover. What is Esther hiding?  Who is she?
Had Mordechai not coached Esther to stand up for herself and as a result the Jewish people, our history may look different today.  By remaining masked in her own shadow, Persian Jewry, may have  been destroyed forever.
Are You Ready to Take a Risk?
Many of us are placed in a position of choosing on a regular basis to either go beyond ourselves and take risks, or instead remain on the sidelines. Hide behind someone else to make big decisions for us, or step out and be seen.
This happens in relationships all the time. So many of my clients share with me, “If so and so were really interested in me, surely THEY would make a move and tell me?”
Rather than seeing and approaching  options, acknowledging how we feel so we can make a move, we hide or quash our feelings and hope someone will chase us. This is wishful thinking, similar to dreams of becoming Cinderella and Snow White. This just doesn’t happen in reality.
If we continue to wait for someone else to take the first step, whether it be in creating the relationship or developing it, where will we be? Imagine that everyone just waited until someone handed us a job, good health, self-satisfaction, a shidduch- we might be waiting an awfully long time- if not an eternity! Who knows what we might be forsaking in the waiting game?  What opportunities might pass us by simply because we’re afraid of standing up for ourselves?
Perhaps the story of Esther is really a wake up call, to consider the consequences of hiding in our own shadow. Maybe it can inspire us instead to be bold and take that chance.
When you’re ready to take your mask off, but need some help, let me know…This is one of my areas of expertise. I can say this boldly and shamelessly, as I have thankfully helped many of my clients overcome their fear of being seen and feeling vulnerable. What lies on the other side is amazing…if you can allow yourself to get there!
Drop me a line at [email protected] and let me know what your afraid of losing out on.